Nicole Kidman cried when she won an Oscar in 2003. It wasn’t for the reason we thought.

Over 20 years ago, for an outsider looking in, it appeared like Nicole Kidman was on top of the world.

But in reality, the Hollywood icon was dealing with a personal crisis. 

In 2003, Kidman won the Academy Award for Best Actress for her portrayal of Virginia Woolf in The Hours. As the Australian actor collected her award, she struggled to contain her emotions, as she joked: “Russell Crowe said don’t cry if you get up there, and now I’m crying. Sorry.”

Watch the speech here. Post continues below.

Kidman has gone on to have one of the most celebrated careers in Hollywood, but looking back at that moment, the actor has admitted it wasn’t a happy one. 

She opened up about the toll her 2001 divorce from Tom Cruise was taking on her at the time. 

“I was struggling with things in my personal life, yet my professional life was going so well,” she said in an excerpt for Dave Karger’s upcoming book, 50 Oscar Nights.

“That’s what happens, right?”

At the time of her award win, her divorce from Cruise had just been finalised. The couple were married for 11 years.

“I’m not a big party girl, so I was going to skip the Vanity Fair party, and everyone was like, ‘You’ve got to go. You’ve got to walk through the party carrying your Academy Award’,” she remembered.